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The original plan was for me to take my shirt off. I know, you’re all drooling on to your keyboards at the thought, but settle down! I needed a goal, something to motivate me to get into shape. This was in February. I rejoined my old L.A. gym, Crunch, which makes absolutely no sense because…

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This is an important message from your sponsor, me. You know how grocery stores sell boneless, skinless chicken breasts more than they do actual chickens? And how people bring them home and cook them in such a way that they’re dry, flavorless pieces of cardboard? And how this leads people to hate food cooked at…

College is for experimenting, right? We know all about your gay make-out session and that time you tried to smoke catnip. When I was in college, I’d experiment with smoothies. I’d go to Smoothie King, right there in Emory Village (because I went to Emory, see) and order a Caribbean Way which was 5 squirts…
Rob Siegel is a cardiologist who joined a big group of us last week, before seeing “Star Trek,” for dinner at The Brooklyn Diner (not the best place for a meal, but a decent option near the Ziegfield Theater). There were so many of us, we were split into two groups, and, unfortunately, I wasn’t…